Welcome to the Energetic Radio podcast. This episode is brought to you

by the school of play dot co, hosted by Dale Sibonham and

Paul Campbell. Each week, we'll bring to you tips, strategies, and ideas

on how you can bring more joy and happiness into your life and those you

share with. Alright. Ladies and gentlemen, boys

and girls, welcome back to the energetic radio episode

354. I am sitting in the bunker at

podcast studio with the ever beautiful baby blue eyes, Dal

Seibelovich. How you going, mate? Thanks, Paul. Cheers, mate. Doing well? Yeah. I'm

doing very well. Thank you, mate. Awesome. And then, you know, I love a a

a useless step with our with our numbers, and we've got a I'm excited, mate.

You're excited? That's the only reason I wanna keep podcasting. I really just anticipate

these grades. It's not a hard act act to follow-up to last week's one

week. Three plus five plus two equals 10. But

03/1954, if you work out the

March of the year Mhmm. And you go back

to our book that is gonna be released mid year. So we go back to

our book, not listeners yet, but they can come back this podcast. Be able to.

Yeah. Yeah. They will find that the March is December. And

on the December, our book talks about Albert Einstein. Oh, there you

go. Oh, and we all know how, incredible that human being was.

And I have no doubt that episode 354 is gonna be as incredible

Live up to that. As Albert Einstein. I'm not

sure if we'll change as many lives as Albert did. So many

theories. So many theories. But I guess if we change one and

one human being takes something from episode three fifty four, we have made an

impact on the world just like mister Einstein We have. Has also. Perfect, mate. Perfect.

And we can and you know, when we're stuck for our stats, we can just

keep rolling them out for the whole year. We can. Don't wanna buy a book

then. It's gonna be a great book, by the way. It is. We finally got

the the submission in. It's quite a large book,

but, also a lot of work went into it. I'm very excited. You gotta love

it when a publisher says, try and make it around 40 to

60,000 words, please, gents, and we roll back with a hundred over a hundred

thousand words. Yeah. A lot more than that. A lot more. Almost double what they

wanted, but, Call quality though. Just not just words. Call quality.

What was what was the she was like, Jeez. How are families gonna read that?

Well, we don't want them to read all a hundred thousand words in One a

day. They're gonna read each day by each day. So Yeah. Anyway. Nah.

I love it. How's the week? Good week, mate. Good week. Breeze has been away

for working aid, which is seems to be the way when we're away. She's

here and we sorta trade, trade things. My four

year old had his tonsils out about a month ago now and, he'd

been a horrible sleeper for a long time and they said it helped really help

his sleeping and it's like it's got worse.

So my shout out to anyone out there, the parent that, just

isn't getting much sleep, I can really empathize with you and,

oh, it's tough. It is, isn't it? And it's amazing how much sleep impacts

on one's brain. We, we ran a workshop

we ran a workshop yesterday, and Sadie

Sadie's been taking a bit of a back seat because I've been learning and I've

been getting a heap under my belt and he's been guiding me along the way

and he's he's earned the right to take a bit of backseat because he's been

doing about eight years, nine years. And, so it's been another one. He did the

one yesterday. It was his show and, I got to sit back and play cameraman

and and throw some tunes on it. And we're at what was it? Second activity,

third activity? And he he's done this a million times. Right? And low and behold,

the old brain fart came out. He did. He explained an activity wrong. No one

in the crowd knew. No one knew, and you never let anyone know. It still

worked. It still worked. And I was just like, wow. What is that? I was

spending a day about it that I literally was that tired

that I didn't know what I was saying. Normally, I don't even think. I can

just talk. You've done something that long, and I was sat back after

they go, woah. What what just happened? Yep. Like, I I've

never experienced that. Brain. I've been tired, but not like this. So Yeah.

Anyway, no. Week's been good. Had some really nice time with both my

boys. My wife's been well, I am excited for her to get out

this week. But, no, it's, yeah. It's one of those things. Everybody

goes through different periods of kids and, yeah. So shout out to

anyone that isn't getting much sleep because, it is really

tough just to be able to function and turn up each day and

try and be happy and positive and, you know, get things done

that normally would be really easy to do, for whatever that

is in your life. But, yeah. For me, it's something I haven't

experienced before. I've never I've always been tired and, you know, but

not to that extent. Yeah. And You know what I've loved about this week? I've

dropped in every and, like, how you going? And I've loved that as a parent,

you've literally planned out activities and games that you were gonna do with the

kids between, like, 04:30 and and 06:30 every night. Yep.

So you've actually literally figured out a game plan pre that time. It's like

I've done a lesson plan. Yes. You spiritually have. Yep. And and then I rock

in the next one. Like, how's last night? You're like, oh, mate. We had so

much fun together. You know what I mean? Sleep wasn't there, mate. Piss me off

that stage. That's okay. But that's not and, you know, I don't I think my

biggest problem's been that you come in tired and straight

away, you're grumpy. Yeah. And I'm like, that's not on them. They've had a day

at daycare in kinder as well, and I need to be better than that.

So I've really been prepared, and I've been planned. And, I've been

creating new games to try with them that I think will work for

where they're both at. And that's awesome. And that's great for our for our kindergarten

curriculum. Curriculum is coming out. Is coming out. And, we often

trial our kid We try a lot because they obviously kids are our guinea pigs,

which is awesome. But What about you, mate? How's your week been? It's been awesome.

Thank you. Today is our shout out to my beautiful wife, Mel. Today

is our ten year wedding anniversary. Yes. We've, made it double digits.

Congratulations, mate. I'm Mel. Time flies when you're having fun and, it's definitely flown

by and we've, released two incredible little children to the world. Yes.

And we have not cured each other. And, now a bit of a date night

plan for tonight, but the weekend, it's been nice. We've always had that workshop yesterday,

but it's been a bit of a slow week for us. We've actually got to

sit in the office and catch up with some admin and and those things. And

it's, yeah, it's actually nice to have a little bit of a slow week compared

to what we've been doing. But I'm just over the heat, to be honest with

you. I'm ready for this, I'm ready for this heat wave to

lead us. Yeah. Just slow down and, yeah, just get some cooler nights and bank

some sleep and those sorts of things. But, yes, summer summer, you can kindly leave

us now. Ready for a bit of fire fire time being

told. Yeah. That's it. But, yes, speaking about play, like, you've been planning sessions with

your kids for the last, couple of nights and don't play. And I wanted to

bring up and made some notes during the week. We introduced Connect four. Good

old classic connect four. Great game to our kids,

late last week. Kelly Fallon, one of our friends, brought it over and and the

boys had never played it and we started playing it. And it was awesome

because my wife got to see firsthand the power of play. I've always

coming home and talking about it and nerding out on it and those sorts of

things. But, I think the penny really dropped last week.

We're playing with our kids and Hunter and Parker five and seven were playing. And

Hunter the seven year old beat the five year old every single game. Five year

old got frustrated. I sat down and said to him, said, do you want me

to give you a hand? He said, yeah. Awesome. So the five year old and

myself played against my seven year old. And not surprisingly, we beat him

because, obviously, I've got better strategic development because I'm older, etcetera. I'd hope

so. You'd hope so. He's he's pretty switched on. I know he is, but surely

not that suspicious. Then we knocked off Hunter a few games in a row. To

his credit, he didn't crack the poops and he stayed resilient. He was like, no.

You know what? And I said, do you want me to teach you, like, and

what my strategy is? And and he was like, yeah. So then I played him

one on one, knocked him off three games in a row. He still didn't give

up. And then I and I started teaching him about play and I'm like, right,

strategy. And and and look for a couple of ways to build your four and

not just focus on one. You gotta focus on defending as a and

the next two or three games, you could see his strategic development literally

taking place in front of our eyes. Yeah. So he got in in twenty's ears.

Yeah. It was insane. All through connect

four and playing, by the seventh game, we were

drawing, and I couldn't get him anymore. And then he even beat me in a

game. Right? So this is a seven year old in the space of half an

hour Yeah. Epic. Of epic of playing something new, something as

simple as connect four, but the cognitive development and the strategic development that

took place in that half an hour is bloody unreal. Yep. And

he'll keep that with him forever now. He and he'll he'll apply that into other

areas. Yeah. Well, I think when he plays other games now, he'll hopefully remember

that. Yeah. You know, that there's other ways to go about things, particularly when

it it's like a puzzle. Yeah. Connect four is a puzzle, you know, and there's

strategic ways of going about it. He will remember that because and the biggest

thing is he didn't crack the shits. He didn't give up. Yeah. And I think

that's the hardest thing that we see now, particularly, you know, with the sessions we

do that if somebody doesn't win, instead of thinking about, alright, how can

I get better? Or what could I do differently? How could I learn? They're like,

I don't wanna win. I'm only doing it if I win. I don't wanna play

anymore. So that is essentially what you've been able to teach him all the way

up, you know, the seven years he's had for him to be able to stick

at it, be resilient enough and go, you know what? I do wanna get better.

I don't wanna walk away and I wanna learn. Yep. And that's all you want.

That was amazing. And you know what? On that, my Mel actually pointed that out.

She was in the kitchen cook at the time. And after going through or form,

he said, no. I want you to teach me. She actually picked up on that

and she highlighted it. She was like, hey, hey, a year ago, you would have

got upset and you probably would have cried. Yeah. But a year on, your resilience

and your determination and we admire that and that was a really cool teachable moment

for us as parents. Yeah. Yeah. And so you just think about that half an

hour of play with the family. We all connected, no TV's on. We had a

great time around the table. We had laugh, strategic development, got a chance to give

him some positive praise. The younger one then obviously learned as well. Yeah. Yeah.

Bloody epic. So everyone, keep playing. Yes.

Honestly, keep playing with your kids even as a simple thing as a connect four,

introduce them to new board games because it will then transfer into different parts

of their life. And as I said, it was a really cool moment for me

to watch watch Mel's eyes light up and go, wow. Yeah. You know, how

sick that And sit back and watch not only what you're able to do, but

more importantly, what unfolded with the two boys. Yeah. I think the best part about

having the Connect four out though was because that was on the on the Thursday

night, and the Connect Four game was still out on the table. You and I

caught you and I caught up with beers on Friday night at my joint. And,

and the Connect Four was out and Sadie rocks and he goes, oh, I love

Connect Four. I was like, I love Connect Four. I'm like, I must admit, I

think I'm pretty good because I've just knocked off a seven year old. And then

Sadie's like, let's have a game. So we cracked a beer and we started playing.

It quickly got to two so it was two nil. Yes. You'll be me. Mine's

side, I won two nil. And Sadie was getting limping for going deepest cross event

match. Yeah. Need to switch on. And then in the third game, he was

very determined and this is the best part of our week so far. In the

third game I own this. I own this too. Real flog

moment. Yeah. We're battling away and and it's it looks like I thought it might

have been a draw. And then Sadie's working his map, and then Sadie turns and

he goes, checkmate. Literally, he goes he

goes checkmate. And I go, do you mind? He goes, checkmate. He goes, you can't

you can't win from here. And little did he know that on the right hand

side of the game board, little Paulie had three yellow

tokens in a row, and I just politely looked him, little smile on my face,

and I just dropped that fourth token in and made four in a row and

went connect four. He got me. But then I suppose very similar to your son,

Hunter. I don't know if you learned this off me, but I was quite resilient.

You were very resilient. And it went from three nil, and then I went, lie,

ladies and gentlemen. The score ended up four three thousand's way.

So he had a great bounce back. I was, I am pretty competitive in

certain elements, and I was probably more just embarrassed by my sheer

arrogance. Oh, god. That was funny. And I really concentrated

after that. But, yeah. Great game. I used to, and I was telling you at

the time, when I was dating, obviously, when I met Brie a few

dates before that, I'd always play connect four because a lot of bars have it

and things like that. I think you've learned so much about a a person,

about how they apply connect four. Yeah. The way they go about

it, the way they play the game, the way they look for different things,

their awareness. Embree was really good at it. It's funny

that, that obviously She's a keeper. She can play Play connect

four. I love it. So, yeah, I find connect four a brilliant game as well.

Yep. Loved it. And, I'll be honest, I'm still gutted that I'll let you come

back from Serena with Diana Beatty four three, but it shows the tenacity of the

man who was an opposite. And, that was awesome. I got a

few things throughout the week that popped up. Obviously my feeds and, you know, I

love listening to pods and those sort of things. And a quote popped across my

mind that I wanna talk about and just share with you and just tell me

your thoughts. You haven't heard it yet? Okay. This is the quote. Embarrassment is

the cost of entry. If you aren't willing to look like a

foolish beginner, you'll never become a graceful master. Oh, love

it. How good is that? That's awesome. Isn't it? And that's I think that really

comes back to what we're just talking about there that around particularly when we bring

up your son, Hunter, again, a lot of students don't

want to feel that embarrassment. Yes. But that embarrassment is only what they

put on themselves. Yep. No one else is making them feel embarrassed unless

you're a real flog like I was and put yourself out there and

degrade someone and then lose. But that that's different. Yeah. Do you know what I

mean? But, having a go, being in the arena,

that's not embarrassment. And I think that's the pressure

we put on ourselves in today's society and why so many kids

don't wanna do that and they won't go, alright. I've lost. How can I get

better? Yep. They'll step away because they do feel that embarrassment,

whereas nobody else is putting that on you. It's that's we're our worst

enemies. Yeah. I agree. And it's not just kids. It's, and we often speak about,

especially at workshops about, as soon as you stop caring

about what other people think about you Yeah. Life will get better. You'll grow as

a person better. You'll enjoy life. Mine. That's the exact thing. Right? But it's not

just kids. It's parents as well. My kids love the skate park. They love

it. And I've got myself a skateboard. I can't skate. Don't get me wrong. I

can cruise around. I can do a little lolly here and there and whatnot. But,

but, I wanna get better at it. Like, I wanna learn and get better at

it. But even me knowing that when all the, you know, when all

the handy skaters are down there and whatnot, even me,

and I'm preaching this stuff, I'm like, oh, maybe I won't get out in the

deck because all these guys are epic and they're doing it. Am I still no.

But then then I catch myself right. Boys need to see who you're doing that.

And I catch myself. I'm like, shit. That, but I did feel this, and

I'm not that good on it. No. And I did feel nervous and embarrassed,

but I was out there. Why? Because I wanna get better and because I wanna

be a few boys Yeah. Not because of them. Yeah. And I wanna become a

graceful master of this amazing school. It's gonna be sick of being able to do

it really well. But, yeah, adults and and young people alike have

that that concern about being embarrassed. And I read that quote and I was like,

man, that is That's good point. Epic, isn't it? It might end up on the

wall at some stage. But, yeah, so it's there on the embarrassment. There's not space

in the walls. No. There's not. Remove some post notes. Notes. Yeah. The walls are

adorable. Yeah. We're saying a couple of post notes in the most planning city.

That's awesome. Yeah. Embarrassment is the cost of entry. If you aren't

willing to look like a foolish beginner, you'll never become a graceful

master. Yeah. And that's So whatever it is you wanna learn yeah. Get in the

arena. Look like be embarrassed, be the foolish

beginner because eventually it will lead to becoming graceful master. Yep. Plain love

that. It was unreal. Very good. It was unreal. A question with that notice for

a young man. Yep. Question with that notion. I love them. And this is a

bit of a they're always random. That's alright. It always pops up with my life.

I know. Is it weird this is my question with that notice. Is it weird

to call people by their first name if they're they're

working retail? So retail workers. Right? People that check out, whatever it might be.

Yeah. Is it weird to call people by their first name

by using their name tag. So for example, I was in Dan Murphy's other week.

I was going to be here for a Friday night session, and a girl called

Kim, and I was like, hey, Kim. How are you going? And she looked at

me as if to say, who are you? What? Well, your name's

Kim. How dare you? What? Everything's true. Looked down and we're both drunk, and she

was like, and then gave me this bit of a look to say, I'm not

sure if that's cool or not. Really? Yeah. And I was like You're making conversation.

Yeah. Using her first name. Is that a plus? So then I walked out there.

I was one of my callers like, is it weird to do that? Is it

rude to do that? Or if you're working in retail, do you prefer when that

happens? And I don't know. Does any do you call people by their first name

using their badge? Yeah. % all the time. I always have a chat with most.

Thank them. I always say, thanks, Kim. Really appreciate you having a lovely day. I

think it's nice when you address them and say, thanks for throwaway comment. Yeah. When

you take the effort to actually look at their name badge and put something

towards that Yeah. Put them in your personal touch or a good connection thing or

whatnot. No. If they creep out, it's like people when you're walking around, you say

hello to them and it scares them, like, far out. I walk past you. It

doesn't take much to look up and smile. I know. I wouldn't care. I get

it every morning in my walks and the dogs, and it still amazes me the

people that just walk past you head down. Yeah. They don't look at you. They

don't look at you. Hi. Good morning. Yeah. And they don't wanna say good morning.

Why are we not saying good morning to each other? I don't know. We're all

walking past each other. Are you doing the country? Hey. Hey. Oh, you're too sick

as I tell you. Hey. You got in the country, you stop and have a

chat. This is true, though. Right? It is. Yeah. Why aren't we doing that? I

don't know. Sorry. It runs. I've had a bit of an

I've had a bit of an epiphany with my running of late and,

comes in the back of what we've been preaching a little bit. I with my

running, I always I got my GPS watch. Right? And every run I put it

on, I can't not put it on. I often said to my missus, like, I

bought her one. I'm like, what did you time yourself now? And for some reason

Why? Why do you need to do that? I'll get there and for some reason

it frustrates me. And I'm like, why why aren't you using that? Why don't you

wanna know your splits? Why don't you wanna know your time pervy? But I've had

a bit of an epiphany lately and I was reflecting on that as well and

was like, right. Why am I running? I'm not running purely

just for bloody times and to try and beat a p p or Strava nash.

No. Strava nash. No. Nobody care. I don't know what to

mean. And it's a it's a it's a status symbol again.

I'm I'm proud of myself because I've had that epiphany, like, man. So now I've

been in bit bit of a game plan at least once or twice a week,

I'm gonna run without my watch. Good. Yeah. It means I might have to take

it off and leave it at home, or it's not too bad. Yeah. I'm gonna

run without it. And I was like, I'm still gonna get the same bloody benefits

out of it. Right? You probably enjoy it more because you're not worried about it.

I'll enjoy it more. And that's a point of exercise is to enjoy it. Don't

worry about your split time. I'll connect with the world around me more. I'll stop

thinking about what pace I'm sitting on. Should I need to push Olivia Hardy? So

I'm I'm getting in less pain because I probably won't push myself as hard and

that's okay. You'll probably enjoy it more. But I'll enjoy it more because I'll just

cruise on feel. And so yeah. I know I've used

Mel a few times now. She's gonna be sitting there going, I told you so.

I'm like, no I said, just enjoy it. Yeah. And I and so I did

my first in the day and just just ran, and it was bloody enjoyable. Good.

No idea what time I did in, but who cares? Gotta let that go. I

did the course. But yeah. That's the whole point. I've got

one for you. Yeah. Obviously, you know, in life, you

see similar people. If you live in the area, you see them in different

situations. And I'm not gonna say where, but this one person I

saw three different times in one day in different situations.

And when do you just say hello? When do you hug?

So this is I'm finding this you know, I'm really

curious around it now because when you meet male to male, you just

shake hands. But normally, when it's male to female or female to female,

they they hug. Yes. But, like, say, in a gym

situation, you walk in and you say hello. You don't go in and give everyone

a hug. But then in other situations, you see those

people or that person, and you give them a hug. Okay. I need that.

Yeah. Awkward, but, like, I just go for a hug now because I don't wanna

be that person that sticks out a hand, and then, oh, and then you get

a hug. Like, it's this real like, you're the one that started the awkwardness, and

then you feel bad. It's like that embarrassment and that quote you're saying.

So instead of not, I just go for a hug now. I just wonder, is

that something other people feel? Because I think about this a bit. And I

think particularly, I know the older you get now, you you hug people more,

which is great. I really I think it's brilliant. But when and

where to do it is a hard thing to know. Completely get why you're

up in the air about it because it me, for example, I yum, I'm

a hugger with women, I guess I'm a hugger. And depending what level I know

them, I'm sometimes a hugger with a kiss on the cheek. Yep. But I've started

dropping the kiss in the cheek with a lot of people because I'm like, is

that too far, Paul? Why are you really giving this person a kiss in the

cheek for, like, that's gone too far? Yep. But even yesterday, we had a meeting

yesterday with with a business meeting Yeah. With a lady who we've met online before

and talked a few times. That was the first time in person. And

was that a shake the hand moment? No. It was only with the hug. You

did go in the hug, and that paved the way for me to go sweet.

I was going with the hug. And then her eyes were a little bit like

I was in her eyes and her eyes would be like, oh, we're hugging. And

she wasn't like, I don't wanna hug her eyes. We were like, oh, we're hugging.

And that that's good. Let's do this. Yeah. We've only this is the first time

we've met, but I feel like we know each other. I just need to go

you have to be really decisive. Yeah. And I feel the hug's the way to

go now. Would you have hugged Joe yesterday if we hadn't met a couple of

times online? Probably not. Yeah. No. Gotcha. Me too.

No. So to answer your question about you before, how do you yeah. I think

you've got to have Oh, you've got to know the person. You've got to have

a connection. Yeah. Not just I was yeah. I don't know. But then

sometimes you meet some people first time, there's a hug. I go There is. And

I think that depends upon this is an amazing topic. Well done. I love it.

I think it'd be a lot of fun. It's fascinating. Right? It's awkward. It shouldn't

be awkward. It should be like a really nice interaction where you're meeting someone for

the first time or you're saying hello to someone, but then I saw you

before. Why didn't I do it there? And now I do it in this situation.

I think in mind mindset, I would shake hands

okay. If if it is a person I'm meeting for the first time, but they're

a friend of a dear friend of mine Yep. And I'm meeting them through them

Yeah. Then you talk about spend some time together, I'd hug. Yep. If I if

it is not a dear friends of mine's friend and I'm meeting for the first

time Yeah. But I'm not talking about the first time. I'm talking about when you

see same people day in, day out, different situations,

but then on a social thing or something, you get. So they're seeing

someone day in, day out in social situations, but then they're seeing them and actually

having a conversation with them. So this person you were questioning No. No. So, like,

we don't have a conversation, but it's just but it not it's not straight

up. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Like, it I'd There is no there is he's

not black and white. That's what he said. There is a lot of gray in

there. Oh, it's so much gray. There is so much gray. I just hope someone's

I know. I can have a listening right now. It's pissing themselves going, oh, there's

been so many moments in my life where I don't know what this, but Yeah.

Yeah. I just I sort of share it because I've I've found it really interesting.

I don't think I've been in a situation where one time in three days is

the same person and twice didn't hug, but then one did. Yeah. Like

yeah. I love that. I was like gonna be in my mind every time now

I'm meeting someone new. Yeah. Anyway, that that's all I've got for

today's podcast. Hey. And it's been tuning my mind a little bit. Well,

maybe you can let it go or you can let it go. I still I'm

still confused about what to do. Yeah. But I

yeah, I'll just lead with a hug. Yeah. And if it creep people head out,

well, at least I was over the top and friendly. Hey. Can you do us

a favor there? Because we often have a lot of people that text us in

and say, yeah, I love the episode. Well done. Yeah. If you're listening and you're

gonna text in, can you text in the school at the school of play, on

Insta? And can you text us in and let us know if you're a hugger

or if you're not and tell us your thought on that? I mean, I'm interested

to know other people's thoughts on on the gray area. Yeah. Yeah. When do you

go in for a hug? Do you not? Let us know, people, that'd be interesting

anyway, and we can steer Dale in the right direction.

We run a workshop for a hundred staff the other day, a network meeting, heaps

of schools. We had a young man come up to us at the end. Do

you remember that young man, Chan? I wanna talk about Chan. His name was Chan

Chan. He had a I paint a real quick

picture. He had a moon boot on and he came up to us and he

thanked us for the session. He said, guys, you know, at the end, we got

everyone to write a pal message. We got them to write a message to someone,

what they're what they're proud of them, what they admire about them, what they love

about them. And he was like, awesome. I love it. You know, inspirational,

blah blah blah. It's great that the whole room did that. And he shared a

tally. He goes, I was overseas, had a really bad accident, could have been a

lot worse. I'm still in the mood, but I'm still recovering wise. I've had to

take a lot of time off work due to it. He goes, I was talking

to a mate about it at the time and and we got talking and it

led us down the line of, you know, jeepers, that could have been a lot

worse. What would you do if you only had a week to

live? And he said, my my we had a conversation about when we're like, well,

that's pretty deep. That is deep. But he goes, but it got me and my

mate thinking about what would we do if we only had a week to live?

And his choice well, we said, well, what would you do? What'd you do? What'd

you come up with? Because we're intrigued, now we're invested. And he goes, I chose

to write a letter to everyone in my life who has meant

something to me across a path or is influenced, whatever it might be. And he

fully committed, made a wax seal and enveloped and everything else and and gave him

and was he's gonna give him a letter while he's still alive. And and he

goes, that's similar what we do in our workshops. And it got us thinking, it

was like, man, how powerful is that, that this bloke had a, had a bad

accident and it made him jolt and go, shit, if I only had a week

to live, what would I do with that week? And his decision was to let

everyone in who knew who he cares about, you know, let them know what what

his thoughts are about them, what he appreciates and those sorts of things. And it

got us thinking, it was like, why don't more of us live life

with that mindset of if time was

running out, what would we do and how do we appreciate people and how do

we let them know? I'd made it for you last year about eighty months ago,

got diagnosed with bowel cancer and and he tells me, he goes, it's completely changed

his mindset Yeah. On how he sees the world and his appreciation for the small

things and yada yada yada. And isn't it some shit ass that it takes something

like that for us to click? Oh, a %. When you look at if you

talk to or hear anyone speak that's, you know, gone from being able

to walk to in a wheelchair or some horrific accident,

ninety nine percent of them are actually really grateful that it happened

Yeah. Because it's made them wake up and realize how valuable and

precious life is. Yep. And I'd I always ask

them, like, is this and I've had a few people on the podcast before you

join, like, can you actually do that if you don't

go through that horrific accident or situation or trauma

that you have been through? Yep. And I don't know if you actually can. I

don't think that you can actually just say, oh, flip it because sometimes you

need to live it and go through that horrendous traumatic experience to

realize that you're still alive and that you're so lucky to have what you do

have. Yeah. Interesting, isn't it? And I think you're right. I think it'd be

hard for the everyday person just to go, okay. I'm gonna picture I've all I'm

gonna be clean. Gone through they haven't gone through something. You have to live through

something or change something or Yeah. Be affected to realize

what you have. And how how effing crazy is that? Yeah. No. No. No. No.

We need we need something better to really appreciate the beauty of life and really

appreciate the beauty of connections and friendships and love and that kind of stuff. And,

yeah. And I'm so grateful that he come and told us that because I've been

it's now planted in my head. And yeah, definitely not

gonna live life thinking I've only got a week to go, but I'm definitely gonna

try and stop and smell the roses and have a little more further appreciation than

what I already do. But, that was really cool. Something else that he that he

told us about, he goes, oh, someone let you guys know that you've got you

had some skeptics in the crowd. He goes, you know, we're rocking Who would've

thought? I know. We've got two idiots rocking up in a t shirt that says

play and, yeah, we're gonna have some fun with you. And he said, you had

some skeptics in the crowd. He goes, but I just wanna let you know that

you turned them around. And by the end of it, they loved it and they

they the feeling they got out of the session was epic and yada yada yada.

And then I was thinking, hey, how much does it suck that so many people

put the walls up? It's happened first. Yeah. I know. But not just not even

just with us. It's just in in life in general, so many folks, so many

people would rock into any sort of meeting or a PD or any social

event or anything, and literally already have the walls up in the mindset that

I'm not gonna enjoy this. And the power of the mindset,

like Probably won't. Like Yeah. And that's what I mean. You have to do people

go, work. I just use a lot of energy. And you that's we have to

do that now because, unfortunately, that's how people come into these

things. Yeah. Well, they've probably sat there throughout the day and spent quite long

and had some nice food and things. So it's a lovely venue, but that's

unfortunate that what it is. You know, you've gotta do that every time. You've gotta

give them an experience that, firstly, they didn't think they needed.

Secondly, that they weren't thinking because you just took them on a journey,

and it flipped them all around. Yeah. It's not that easy to do. That's not,

is it? But I wonder if those people walked out of that room going, shit.

No. They'd probably do the same thing again. My mindset was pretty crappy when they

were running. Now I was closed off. I was sure I didn't wanna be there,

but I I needed it and I loved it. So yeah. But, yeah, I just

wondered if that penny would drop for half of them go, alright. I need to

be a bit more open minded next time and and whatnot. And if you're out

there listening, you probably know yourself. I'm one of those people that walks in the

thing with the with my walls already up with my eyes closed.

But, yeah, let that go. Let it go. Be open to everything. You just never

know what's gonna throw. Don't worry. If we shit ourselves the first twenty minutes, go

get We made we had four activities. You made a mistake and I made

two. It wasn't too long, wasn't it? Catching up with

Connect Four. It was so good. What else you got in your notebook there, mate?

Shit. It's taking some notes. I know. My last one. Last

one. I've got a few more, but I'm gonna go last one because we're already

ready half an hour. So I'm gonna go last one. I

someone taught me something really cool the other day, about

journaling. And we'll talk about journaling and those sorts of things. And often you and

I, we don't like to write things down because it can be judged and and

we don't believe in the power of writing things down, especially gratitude and stuff. But

this person had a chat to me. He goes, journaling, he goes,

never the the comment was never waste your suffering. And that's

what got me. I was like, woah. That's deep. And he was like, honestly, you

guys, Paul, never waste your suffering. And he goes, so if ever you

can sorry to interrupt. So you can by writing it down, you can always come

back to it. Yeah. Well, this this is a game plan, Tommy. So now I

wanna teach freaking out loud. Yeah. No. No. I love that. Because I wanna teach

this to people. He goes, sorry. Never waste your suffering. If something bad

happens to you or you have a failure or a loss or something doesn't go

your way, whatever it is, write it down. And then leave

two spaces or two lines underneath it, and then and then go about your

life. A month later, come back to it. And then a month later,

come back to it, and under that one thing that didn't go well or you

failed it, whatever it might be, write down what you've learned from it now. Oh,

that is cool. Isn't it? That's really good. And then it gets in bending, goes,

then put it away, and then come back to it two months later. So another

month down the track, come back to it, and then write down something good that

came from it and from those lessons. Wow. He goes, you'll very quickly

learn to love to make mistakes and love to fail, and

you'll love to write that thing in your, you know, never waste

your suffering journal. Let's call it that. Because you'll very quickly learn that

you're that when by doing it, you know that in a month's time, you're gonna

learn you're gonna reflect and learn something from it, and in two months time, you'll

look back and go, shit, something good came from that. Time heals all, but only

as well when you're willing to acknowledge that and also allow

yourself to think about the learnings and the growth you've taken place. Mhmm. And that's

what it does because it's written down. Yeah. Without journaling, you just go about your

day and you would get over it. You would learn from it. There would be

positives, but you're not taking the time to reflect on it. Yeah. Bang. Bang. That

is really good. Imagine looking back at the end of the year, you do that

for a year, do it with your kids or yourself, whatever it might be, and

you come back at the end of the year, and you go through all the

failures or the things that didn't go well, and then reflect upon what you learned

and the good stuff that came from it. And it'd be a pretty epic tale

come the end of the year. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be really tough. For you, like,

I think just for you as an individual. Like, I don't no one else cares

because everyone else got their own stuff going on and everyone's so busy. Yep. But

I think personal growth for you as an individual. Because, you know, we get

caught up in tough times or days that go rough or things aren't going how

we wanted to. But when you sit back, overall, there are only little bumps,

and if you reflect on them and grow, and then you learn from it,

that's exactly what that journaling does. So now I've I've never heard that. I've never

heard that. Yeah. So never waste your suffering. Write it down. Come back to

it in a month. Oh. Yeah. What you've learned from it, then come back another

month, and what's what was something good that came from it. So I might, haven't

done it yet, but I might start doing it and see how it impacts me

and see how it goes. But I thought that was a really cool lesson that

some guy taught me. Loved it. Very good, mate. That's

it for me, Sadie. That's, that's all I've got as well. I just Yeah. Beautiful.

I just had more awkward hugging, handshake. That's so so we had all heartedly. A

bit of checkmate and connect for you. That's alright, mate. Yes. And I did I

had to get that out there. I apologize for this. No. And you said that

straight up. That's fair enough. And I said, please use it. Yeah. I won't lie.

When it when it occurred, I walked around my my kitchen area, fist pumping and

pissing myself with laughter going, this is the best thing that's ever happened this week.

And it went straight in my podcast, and I've got a little section on my

phone that wrote podcast ideas. And I was like, I'm like, mate, that's going to

podcast. Yeah. You can definitely come in. I wanna write it. Bouncing back and beat

me before That's awesome.

Alright, ladies and gentlemen. We hope you have an amazing week ahead.

Good luck to everyone. Do something kind. Be

awesome.